lyrics from Scott Cook and the Long Weekends Go Long

Long Weekends Theme

Judging by the angle of the sun
I'd say it's beer o'clock
Judging by the damage that we've already done
To that cooler, we might need to re-stock

Talk about a late one last night
Swapping songs and laughing well past dawn
When the seagulls and the early risers arrived with the daylight
We weren't phased, just put on our shades & carried on

I don't know where the nighttime went
Or where my urge to sleep has gone
But everyone outside my tent is
Just too damn entertaining on
A long, long weekend
It might be the death of me, but what a sweet death it would be
On a long, long weekend
I don't think I ever wanna go back home

If you're gonna whip it, whip it good
If you're gonna live it, live it strong
If you're gonna trip it, you take it easy, knock on wood
And if you're going out for the weekend, go long!

Some might say I'm slow getting started
But you don't sprint in a marathon, you see
And you know, I've been known to sometimes have a bit too much of the party
And once or twice the party even had too much of me

You might get to worryin' about the parts of your vacation gone
But what you lose in memories you'll gain in reputation on
A long, long weekend
It's all about the pacing, son, no need to be racing on
A long, long weekend
Party legs, don't fail me now

There's a funny thing about us Canadian boys
Most need a certain amount of booze before they can dance
But all these pretty women and the sweet music have filled me with such joy
I think I might even give the hula hoop a chance

This right here is a cure for alienation
This right here can solve wage slavery
It put me on the rocky path to self-realization
And I found myself a paved road to poverty

But I'd trade all the cash in the bank for this big lovin' family
And I have you kind folks to thank for supporting my delinquency
On the long, the long weekends
The longest are the sweetest kind, fill my heart and blow my mind
Those long, long weekends
It might be the death
Well, it just might be the life
Oh, I do believe it's the life for me

Will the Circle Be Unbroken?

It's anybody's guess out in the campground
The Banana Man's got a new dance
By the drum circle there's a drunk circle
They say play something we can sing, but they can't
They talked this one guy into American Pie
Then Me and Bobby McGee, the poor kid
When they sang you can check out anytime you like
We took a hint, and we did

We followed the call of a doghouse bass
The promise of new songs and sounds
And stumbled upon a cluster-folk
A bunch of folk buddies, just folkin' around
They had concertinas and autoharps
Singing hey, ho, blow the man down
And it won't be long 'til She'll Be Comin' 'Round
The Mountain When She Comes comes around

Will the Circle Be Unbroken has broken up a few
And if I hear I'll Fly Away again, that's just what I might do
Somebody says, "Yo! Play something we know"
And the lonely hearts whisper, play something blue
And that guy with a djembe, just a campfire away
He wanna jam it with you

Some songs just need puttin' out to pasture
Hang up the jersey in the rafters
They served 'til it hurt, they were well overworked
They earned their sweet hereafter
I wish Sally's Mustang was impounded
And the Wagon Wheel rolled off eternally
I won't be redeemed by Redemption Song
And please don't put The Weight right on me

I realize it's a matter of perspective
But a guy's gotta draw a line somewhere
Then again I read some scientist said
Every possible universe is already there
So when that fella started singing Oasis
And up 'til then I hadn't took him for a fool
Rather than be ungracious
I believe in an alternate universe in which that's cool

Tax Free Money (by Scotty Dunbar)

Waitresses and strippers, come with me, we know where it's at
You can tell by the sound it makes that it's a toonie in the hat
Just sing it more like Timberlake or Beiber and watch the cash roll in
Cauterwaulin' on the corner's how I pay my rent, I'm earnin'

Tax free money, tax free money
Tax free money, that's what I want honey
Tax free money, tax free money
If you can spare a brother some, lay it on me

Nobody pays taxes, when you get paid it's already gone
They are orchestrating crises to take your pension fund
We are so meek my friends, robbin' us doesn't even take a gun
You think they're worryin' about the deficit? I think they're having fun with your

Well, GM pays no taxes, Apple pays no taxes
Oil giants pay no taxes, man, 'cause they know what to do
You see another year go by without nothin' to show
Can't you hear 'em my friends? They's a-laughin' at you, they got your

If I'd been a little bit smarter, I'd've been a bank robber
Singing these songs's just the best I can do
But around campfires and bars, I'm already a star
Just come and see us now and then and we will sing a few for you, and take your

A Lifer for a Wifer

A lifer for a wifer, is that too much to ask?
I'm far enough down this road, I won't be coming back
Lots of buddies' wives were nice as pie, 'til they got 'em in that ring
I'll take a lifer for a wifer or I'll skip the whole damn thing

Lots of buddies' wives were nice as pie, they let 'em have their fun
'Til all of a sudden they were husbands and all of that was done

I'll take a lifer for a wifer, otherwise I won't get caught
It ain't lovin' me to want me to be something that I'm not
And this ramblin' 'round singin' songs ain't a hobby, it's a life
Only lifers understand, only a lifer could be my wife

I don't care if she's tall or short, or if she's rich or poor
I'm just hopin' she can pick and grin, and harmonize of course

And doesn't mind going camping, and doesn't mind bars
Extra points if she knows a thing or two about fixing cars
She's gotta have her head on straight, so I can trust her take on things
And if she can diddle the big bass fiddle I'll be wrapped around her strings

If you see her, can you tell her we'd make a real good match?
I still got my looks, and I love to cook, my friends say I'm a catch
My bills get paid, and I'm not afraid to talk about how I feel
And my favourite place is the jade gate, and I ain't too proud to kneel

Could be I'm asking too much of one special one
But if the shoe don't fit, I'd just as well get my lovin' on the run

A lifer for a wifer, it's the only way I'd go
I'm far enough down this road, don't you think by now I'd know?
And I'll be content to wander on alone through this sweet life
But if I'd ask one last blessing, it'd be a lifer for a wife
If I'd ask one last blessing, it'd be a lifer for a wife

I Live Down Here (by Raghu Lokanathan and Scott Cook)

Don't you make a tomb of my town
I live down, I live down, I live down here
Don't know about forever but at least for now
I live down, I live down, I live down here

They say it's a dodgy place
But it's here that I know everybody's face

Like that's my friend upstairs with my ex
That's losing your turn with sound effects

Gollum said to young Bilbo
"She's my precious, don't you know?"

And Job said to God most high
"Won't you pick on someone your own size?"

What did the South Dakotan say to the North Dakotan?
What did the Mexican say to the Minnesotan?

A snail walks into a bar, says
He says, "Have you heard my low C#?"

Don't go poopin' on me, seagull
I have a friend named Mr. Eagle

And don't you make a tomb of my town
Don't you lay that pipeline down
Oh, don't you make a tomb of my town

Sweet Maddie Spawton

Sweet Maddie Spawton
Where are you now?
No tellin' where you'll go, you're a rambler, don't I know
In your sweet time, get back somehow

If you're traveling in the north country
Bring your long johns
Bet your life, overalls and a jackknife
By the time they see you, you're long gone

You swear like a sailor
And you lean like the sea
When your blood's running, you smell like a woman
Who just might be harder than me

Sweet Maddie Spawton
Where are you now?
Runnin' down the road, oh, I love to watch you go
In your sweet time, get back somehow

No lord and no master
No god and no king
Own your own labour and you don't need a saviour
I guess you could get away with anything

Ballin' in the country
Bummin' in the town
Look at us high-rollin, all this stuff was stolen
It'll get real when the shit goes down

Sweet Maddie Spawton
Where are you now?
Blowin' on through, that's just what ramblers do
In your sweet time, get back somehow

Here's to tucker when you're hungry
Whiskey when you're dry
Friends when you're hard up, ignition when you start up
And sweet freedom when you die

Sweet Maddie Spawton
Where are you now?
No tellin' where you'll go, you're a rambler, don't I know
In your sweet time, get back somehow

Drink Poverty History

Wouldja look at that Bono on TV again?
He's Bob Geldof with a costume change
And there's still no snow in Africa this Christmastime
And good, 'cause wouldn't that be strange?
Who does this Russell Brand guy think that he is?
Isn't he just another self-important poseur?
I get my kicks lookin' at chicks
And hanging out with you hosers

Drink poverty history
Drink this thing into the black
Drink to the things that you wish you were rid of
They'll be there for you when you get back

The afternoon world, with a two-beer shine's
'Bout as perfect as anything can be
And if you can keep it right there on the line
You're a much better person than me
It's partying with you, then it's partying alone
Then it's do you even have to ask?
Some people got video games and pizza
I got a case and a flask

Wouldja switch up the channel? I can't stand the news
Saying the whole country's broke
While I'm going in the hole just tryin' to make a living
Someone's making a killing I know
But they still take my card right here at the bar
So I say just keep 'em coming
There's still a sunset to ride off into
As long as they keep the taps running

Talkin' Anthropocalypse Blues

Remember Y2K?
Remember what you did that day?
Were you scared the machines would turn on us all?
Or maybe your phone just wouldn't work?
Maybe aliens would come to earth?
Could've been a mushroom cloud, or heaven's bugle call
Me and some friends took a trip down south
And we were on a beach, hanging out
With folks from all over the world, feeling nothing but fine
We drank until we got demented
Counted down for each time zone represented
And partied like it was 1999
'Cept it actually was, it wasn't just a figurative thing
And when it turned 2000, well, we kept on partying
Getting kinda silly by that point
Stumbling around, yelling at clouds
The new millennium was looking pretty messy so far

But you can't always party daily and nightly
And not everyone takes those kind of things lightly
Some folks got more serious concerns
Take William Miller, back in 1818
With all the scripture he'd been studying
He got to figuring out when Jesus would return
Once he was done calculating
He got to proselytizing & debating
And within several years he rounded up thousands more
They had pamphlets and meetings, the more the merrier
Saying God would cleanse the sanctuary or
Something like that, October, 1844
And after waiting years for their coming king
They started giving away everything
Unconcerned with possessions or employment
But when the day finally rolled around
And Jesus was nowhere to be found
They had what was called "The Great Disappointment"
Some said they'd botched their calculations
Used the wrong calendar or computations
And He was still coming, just a few months or years later
Some other folks just figured they'd been wrong
Figured they'd better try and keep their home
And think of a way to explain it to the neighbours
And somehow find the wherewithal
To stock that pantry after all;
Heck, maybe they should even go and see the dentist!
But some other folks insisted it really did happen
Just not on earth, but up in heaven
And they became the Seventh-Day Adventists
Now, if there's any Adventists listening
I really don't want to offend you...
Really, I've got friends who are Adventists!
I mean, I met one one time
Besides, we've all got crazy ideas of our own
For instance, I thought this would be
A nice little subject to write a song about!

Back in the first century, off the Turkish coast
On a little Greek island called Patmos
A guy wrote down a bunch of visions he thought reliable
And rather than asking "what's this guy on?"
People named it the Apocalypse of John
And 300 years later they decided it was in the Bible
And I grew up believing it'd all come true
Just when and how nobody knew
But God was coming back to get His biz done
First time by water, next time fire
Righteous and wicked to divide
And we'd get a new world in exchange for this one
And it was gonna happen soon!
'Cause things are obviously getting worse
There's no turning it around
There's no saving this Earth
Nothing worth saving anyway!
You got men marrying men, men marrying dogs, trees...
Next thing you know some guy's gonna marry his truck!
It's just wrong!

Now some cheeky folks offer a service
To believers who are getting nervous
To ease their mind about their dogs and cats
'Cause pets don't get raptured, you see
So these folks say, for a small fee
They'll feed and walk 'em in the unlikely event of that
And boy, if it happens like they say
And all the believers are borne away
You can be sure those atheists'll come around then!
Once they find out they lost the bet
They'll take real good care of your pets
It might be their last chance left at gettin' in!
It's written no man knows the day of the Lord,
But I saw it on some big billboards!
Harold Camping figured it out, and wrote it up high
God must've thought, who's this hack?
Maybe He was even planning to come back
And then didn't, just to spite the poor old guy!
After May 21st went by, people laughed but he stuck to his guns
Said it'd been a spiritual event, not a physical one...
And the real thing was coming, October 21st, 2011... Poor Harold!
He kinda lost his enthusiasm for predictions after that

2012 was gonna be big, right?
That shit was gonna be tight!
They had special calculations we could rely on
This wicked old world's gotta make room
It's the start of a new baktun
According to the calendar of the Mayans
Well, those Mayan dudes may've been rough
But they sure did make some amazing stuff
And they really must've been rapidly evolving
They didn't waste time with messy elections
They put the pedal down on natural selection
By cutting off your head if you lost a ballgame
But what'd they think 2012 would mean?
Would the poles reverse? Would the sun turn green?
Would we see the planet Nibiru? Would it destroy Man?
Or was it the dawn of the Aquarian Age
Our ascension to another vibratory stage
Without war, injustice, materialism, or boy bands?
Terence McKenna predicted the singularity
With all the hard-earned sincerity
And certainty that goes with dedicated research
See, he made a computer program, threw the I Ching
Ate psilocybin mushrooms and some other things
And as a result, he was 'bout as sure as anyone on Earth
Funny thing about being sure:
The more you are, the less I believe you
Especially if it's that crazy-eyed, foaming at the mouth kind of sure
The kind where no matter what happens, it still proves you're right!
And if you don't see it
Well, it was just more of a hidden, spiritual thing...
Anybody see a pattern here?

We're pretty good at getting it wrong
This song'd be even more stupidly long
If I tried to tally up everybody's guesses
One thing in common with all these tales
They depend on someone besides ourselves
As if we won't have to clean up our own messes
As if we're the last people on earth
As if these times are the craziest there ever were
As if we're not just holding space here for our grandkids
As if it's all gonna turn to black and white
And everyone's gonna see the light
And convincing won't be as hard as it always is
Like we won't have to change minds one by one
It'll just happen, it'll just get done
We won't have to take time with all the messy stuff
Of building bridges, loving people in
Realizing when we're wrong even
And learning how to stop when we've had enough
Sounds like a pretty tall order, right?
God help us, you say? Or what?
It's gonna take a miracle to save us from ourselves, right?
What if we're the only miracle we've got?

This world has gotta end
This world has gotta end
It's on us to make a new one my friends!

The Kid with the Comic Book (by Trevor Mills)

The Earth was shipped in a cellophane wrapper
To a godlike kid by galactic courier
He'd placed an order from the back of a comic book
He'd read when he should've been in school
He had a project due in his socio-anthro-
Eco-geo-bio and creationism course
That he should've been working on instead of playing games
With his gang of omnipotent pals
The project was due in a hundred thousand years
Which can hardly be construed as enough time
To populate a planet with intelligent beings
Who can live in a self-sustaining way
But he saw in the comic book an ad for a planet
With a species on the brink of developing intelligence
That could be shipped in a cellophane wrapper
And he thought, it's my ticket to an A!
Now it might seem to you like a hundred thousand years
Is a long time, but if you just consider
That the kid with the comic book would see a hundred thousand
Years pass like the twinkle of a star
So the kid put the Earth on his desk in his bedroom
Underneath a heat lamp that he kept on a timer
On his walls he had made constellations
That were stars that could glow in the dark
And he worked as the species on the brink of intelligence
Grew, found fire, built bombs and exploded them
He cried when he learned the killing was so often
Interspersed with the praising of his name
So the kid with the comic book turned on the heatlamp
Took a magnifying glass from his leftmost cupboard
And looked to the Earth, picked a symbolic bush
And focused, and set it on fire
And when the bush was burning the people got the message
And the leaders agreed to take responsibility
And base their actions on accountability
And promise that they'd try to get along
So the kid took the Earth to his teacher, who looked
And saw good work and the room for improvement
Not a bad first try, B plus, and excitement
For your many more creations still to come
And now the Earth lies wrapped in bubble-wrap there
On the floor of the closet of the kid with the comic book
His mother checks in every now and then
To ensure that things will work out in the end
And so everything will work out in the end

Come This Far

This old world it started out mean, getting meaner still
Some folks get religion, some folks take a pill
Some folks just check out, and some folks stay
You can be sure I didn't come this far not to go all the way

If you gamble on your heart, if you bet it all on grace
They can read it on you like a tattoo on your face
But you got to lay your money down if you wanna play
You can be sure I didn't come this far not to go all the way

Woody said the fascists are bound to lose, but man they sure do linger
Last I heard the invisible hand was giving us the finger
But if Dr. King was here, you know what he would say
You can be sure we didn't come this far not to go all the way

We didn't plant these shade trees, we didn't dig this well
The old folks did it way back when and as far as I can tell
Forward's the only way left to repay
You can be sure we didn't come this far not to go all the way

You got a restless heart, that's alright with me
You go on and do your thing, honey I still believe
You're gonna let me cook you breakfast some fine day
You can be sure I didn't come this far not to go all the way

So I believe I'll just stay hungry, keep on askin' why
Keep living for a living, lighter as the years roll by
"Dream on," they said, and I said, "okay"
You can be sure I didn't come this far not to go all the way

The Day that You Were Born

Well, I'm not that old but I've heard it told
That fourteen billion years ago
There was nothing at all, and then something so small
And so heavy it had to explode
And there was more than enough primordial stuff
To make sextillions of stars
And when some cooled down there were planets around 'em
And one of those planets was ours
And thanks to water in the ocean and molecules in motion
And heat and who knows what else
Some proteins entwined and recombined
And started making copies of themselves
And of all the mutations and strange combinations
The weirdest one without a doubt
Could stand up tall and wonder at it all
And even figure this kinda stuff out
Well, that big of a coincidence doesn't make a lot of sense
And nobody knows what for
Could've been unplanned or by God's hand
But the only thing of which I'm sure
Is that you are the fruit of something inscrutable
Spanning untold millennia
And now here you stand with a drink in your hand
So I suggest you get it in'a ya

It's the day (it's the day)
That you were born (that you were born)
And we got plans for you, hope you're not workin' in the morning
Your mama remembers proudly and your friends get drunk and rowdy
On the day (on the day) that you were born (that you were born)
The lucky day that you were born

(You remember that day? Of course you don't!
Don't worry, I'll tell you how it went...)
Well, your dad was frettin' and your mom was sweatin'
And you had your own share of strife
Then you came out crying and everyone was sighing
'Bout the wonder of the cycle of life
But of all the mysteries in your history
There's really no riddle as hard as
How such a little doll, so precious and small
Could grow up to be such a big smart-ass

I said it's a-lucky for us and that's just because
There's really nobody quite like you
You're a good friend to have, and we get lots of laughs
At all the goofy-ass things you do
I've heard the wisdom of a sage comes with old age
But I don't see how that's true
Cause no matter how old you get, you're still full of shit
You're welcome, and I love you too

Last chorus: If you don't act your age, you just might feel it in the morning

That's Life (Loving You Right Back) (by Corin Raymond)

In the bottle there's a half a glass of red wine
On my floor there's a trapezoid of sunshine
If I could crack my head and spill out all my daydreams
You'd find rhyme schemes, self-esteems, and moonbeams
If I could show you everything my skin hides
If I could peel me back and look into my insides
You'd find a love burnin' a hole in my heart
All the love I give away's gonna ricochet back my way someday
I say, all the love I give away's gonna ricochet back my way someday
I think today I'll stop keepin' track
And just say, that's life, loving you right back
That's life, loving you right back
Makes me wanna get my bare feet on and do a little boogaloo
Makes me wanna write you a song for when you're feeling blue
Something you can shake it to, send a shiver through your sacroiliac
That's life, loving you right back
That's life, loving you right back
Living you right, loving you right back
That's life

A song is an act of premeditated beauty
A song is joy, and I consider it my duty
On a Saturday in the middle of September
To sit in the sun and sing this little number
That says I got a love burnin' a hole in my heart
All the love I give away's gonna ricochet back my way someday
I say, all the love I give away's gonna ricochet back my way someday
Makes me wanna get my bare feet, makes me wanna run through the rain
Makes me wanna laugh and shout and sing a bold refrain
That goes against the grain, rolls just like a train down the track
That's life, loving you right back
That's life, loving you right back
Living you right, loving you right back
That's life

While the Party's Still Going

I'm a sucker for fun, passing it 'round 'til it's done
Staying up 'til the sun comes a-blaring
See, I just wouldn't wanna miss the ridiculousness
and the songs, and the drunken feats of daring
But if you see something worthy in waking up clear and early
It means leaving while the campfire's still glowing
Though I wish it weren't so
Oh, sometimes you just gotta go while the party's still going

When you're out with a gal, and all your good-timing pals
Are doing shots and the band is a-rockin'
And she puts her hand in yours
Says would you waltz me outdoors?
There's a starry cathedral for talking
'Neath the full-bellied moon, with the sweet fading tunes
You slip out without anyone knowing
When she asks you just so
Oh, sometimes you just gotta go while the party's still going

We were tying one on when the word came from home
That our good buddy Fred had crossed over
He'd seen the world with the bands, gave us young bucks a hand
He was gracious, and steadfast, and sober
Now I remember those things with each song that I sing
And the river of music keeps flowing
Wish I could tell him so
Oh, sometimes you just gotta go while the party's still going

I been all 'round this world, fell for all kinds of girls
And I thank every wrong turn that brought me
Still I long for certain places, and beautiful faces
And the bittersweet music they taught me
Ah, but leaving's not to fear, it's what landed me here
And it's what keeps this heart overflowing
I could stay here, I know
Oh, sometimes you just gotta go while the party's still going